I Cast Light!

DOWNTIME DEMANDS OF SENTIENT WEAPONS: Or The Care & Feeding of Excalibur

Elric & Stormbringer
by Piotr Jablonski*

Sentient weapons and magic items should be like an annoying NPC

With great power comes a great lists of spurious demands. No matter if the object contains a true soul or is more similar to an arcane AI. Jennell Jaquays had great magic items like Tim the Fish Amulet with a great personality and several items in The Dark Tower, which had their own goals. And of course, Stormbringer is a character all its own in the Elric saga.

To me, a sentient weapon is not human. It understands its own purpose very well and desires to execute above all else, all the time. It finds it very hard to relate to its human welders. If for some reason it can relate, well most likely it was human at some point and that usually means a lot of baggage. I mean just look at vampires- they were once human too.

There can be positive benefits too. It might be that adorning the weapon or building a shrine could attract attention from other factions. Maybe knight errants come to kneel at an alter to the sword and offer a week of service. Maybe when traveling, the PC increases the disposition of neighboring towns towards the party as rumors of the sacred Mirror of Stars- perhaps even the queen seeks to know her baby's fortune.

Below are d20 such demands to be rolled during downtime periods. The request must be performed during the following downtime. If not, roll on the hireling negotiation table. Should they be ignored, a magic weapon will be just +1 and will refuse to perform any but innate functions. After all, the great Sword of the Sky is no mere rapier! Its not meant to just hang about your person like 50' of rope or that thuggish crowbar!

Demands of Sentient Weapons (& Perhaps Of Other Intelligent Objects)

I should be oiled or polished with expensive agents
Fancy display case or scabbard of rare materials
I wish to be paraded
I wish to be better known
I should be utilized 3 times next delve
I desire to walk around in your body, let me possess you
A change in scenery is needed; we should travel to the next town
You must carouse with me; excitement is needed
You should commission a poem about me
I should be housed for a week in a place of worship aligned to my purpose
Your skill is weak- practice with me 1d3 weeks (PC cannot adventure)
The king/lord must hear of my exploits, seek an audience and tell them
Three foes should be struck down by me
You should appreciate my other talents (only use innate or non-combat talents)
You should know my history and place in the centuries, find it!
You only need me and no other protection! (Wear no armor)
Announce me with vigor! (All to-hit attempts are prefaced by a player battle cry)
Your vestments should match my regalness and you should bear my icon.
Your flesh shall rot, I am eternal- designate who shall bear me when you die
You are an adequate bearer, nothing is needed…today.

*Really wish I had picked up these Elric reprints from Centipede Press when I had the chance

THE UR-GODS: Matter, Time, Energy, Thought, & Entropy

In the Rules Cyclopedia, there is a section on anti-magic that explains what is is in terms of RC Basic D&D game. And in that explanation, is brings up that all creatures on the prime material plane are made of four components: matter, time, energy, and thought, but that creatures in the astral plane might lack one of those components. Here is the passage below:

It is interesting here that one could devise a pantheon of gods around these 5 forces. But given that they are so primal and foundational, I view them as the D&D version of the Greek Titans. They are the gods of gods, but more specifically, they are forces that underpin the gods. And I see them as also falling along the Law-Neutral-Chaotic axis presented in basic: Matter & Time (Lawful), Energy & Thought (Neutral), and Entropy (Chaotic).

So could these be the gods of a campaign? Are these concepts too abstract for players to role-play? And why do they all still allow turn undead?

And I think it might be interesting to consider monster design in terms of taking a vanilla creature and removing one of those 4 forces. Like, what do you get if you take "frog, giant" and remove matter, energy, time, or thought?

NIGHTWICK ABBEY: The Purple Eater of People, Session 124

Want to learn more about the world of Nightwick from Miranda? You can follow her blog here and the ongoing development of Nightwick Abbey at her Patreon here.

Previously in Nightwick...

Blossom (Rogue 6)
Mayfly (Magician 6)
Thekla (Magician 5)
Ulf (Magician 5)
Liminal Space (Changeling 5)
Poppy (Fighter 5)
Pataki (Graverobber 4)
Yevgeny the Coward (Cleric 4?)
Felix (Dwarf 1)

At the Medusa's Head...
The group deliberates on any "unfinished business" on the first level. Meaning, what foul captains of the Pit have not lost their heads to our hands. We settled on one last target- the [REDACTED]

...Then Down to the Abbey...

The party had to flip way back to their older maps in order to chat a path through the Abbey's upper works (PC NOTE: mapping works y'all!)
The trip should have been easy, but a colony of fungal zombies halted progress but a fireball from the hands of one of the party's many magicians sauted those 'shrooms (PC NOTE: seriously, our party is spellcasters and thieves...and the Dark Country's most beloved being- Liminal)
The fungal zombies cause further deliberation since they generally reside on lower levels- is something pushing up? Worrying as these same monsters laid low Sotar, a Cleric of the 4th level (RIP to a real one)
We also visited the [REDACTED] to show it off to the new party member and ended up tusslin' with some goat men who had ample coin and a figurine of the Lady (uncorrupted; 500sp)
This led us to the lair of our intended target, which is cut off from the rest of the Abbey. We experimented with a few different ways of reaching the beast and found success in rotating magicians out in a tense moment of trying not to die every 3 rounds.
In the end we were able to walk away with some new spells, silver, and furniture!

...And back to the Medusa's Head

Together this action clear the first level of all the "hot-spots", but the presence of the fungal zombies might mean we've just cleared space for a new foe to make its home!

TABALDAK'S GEAS: The ICL 2025 Appx. N Jam Entry

Last Thursday, I submitted an entry to the 2025 Appx. N Jam!

The Appx. N Jam was an itch.io contest requiring submissions to be a four-page RPG adventure based on a made-up book title that was randomly assigned. Those titles were of the vein of those old swords & sorcery novels found in the AD&D DMG's Appendix N- the influences for AD&D listed by Gygax.

For a great collection of Appendix N stories, I would like to recommend Appendix N: The Eldritch Roots of Dungeons and Dragons edited by Peter Bebergal from MIT Press.

I was hoping to get a title such as [The Location of the Noun + Noun], like "Crypt of the Red Wizard". This sort of title gives a clear idea about the dungeon and the random encounter table.

Instead, I got "Tabaldak's Geas", which, while it gives a potential antagonist, a "geas" is not a location nor something that could be easily used as a treasure. Furthermore, a geas in the D&D sense often forces the players to do X. For example, in OD&D, running across a wizard stronghold might result in a geas being applied to the party, forcing a task of some sort.

So I decided to combine ideas that had been kicking around for the Appx. N Jam:

The idea of the Deck of Many Things has been used as a campaign starter since its often considered a campaign breaker
A cult based around mistaking a beholder-kin (which has create food & water) as a bounty-delivering god
Try to submit a fairly good-sized dungeon (I hit 23 rooms)

Here is the synopsis I created for the dungeon:

“Who has misfortune thrown into this trap’s jaws?"
Escaping danger, the PCs are trapped in the villa of an inscrutable, unscrupulous, and absent sorcerer, the Lord has gone mad, the Captain is hopeless, the Vizer is obsessed, & the Friar turned heretic...
The only way out rests under the baleful gaze of The Eye!
This 23-room dungeon villa tasks the PCs with finding a way to escape the powerful geas that holds them prisoner. They will have to navigate the dead that the geas won't let rest, hungry familiars angry at their abandonment, candle-wax doves that hate light, and a dream-mad lord stalking the halls. All the while, they will puzzle over the tria prima, bemoan a mask made of cheese, tame a desk with a nasty disposition, and ponder the black lacquor box below the alien monstrosity at the center of the villa.
An adventure for four characters levels 1-2 (or twice as many level 0)

I'll try to do a more specific post-mortem after the Jam is over, but overall, I am very pleased that I was able to create, key, and design an old book cover for the Jam. And look forward to maybe doing it next year or participating in other design contests. Below is the map and random encounter table.

If you are interested in other designs that I've done, please check out the free Designing Dungeons course I co-wrote with Josh, the 2025 SILVER ENNIE (Best Game & Best Rules) award-winning author of His Majesty the Worm

PRACTICAL MAGIC IV: Magical Mentors Are Useful Tyrants

🎨 David Mattingly You know a wizard mentor would teleport into your home, drink all your beer, & eat your snacks

For more in the Practical Magic series

In most editions of D&D, the relationship between NPC mentor and PC magic-user is only vaguely defined and perhaps a missed opportunity for world-building.

OD&D says nothing about the relationship between a magic-user and a possible mentor. Only noting that MUs should have 1 spellbook per level of magic- one book for level 1 spells, one book for level 2 spells. Looking at the stronghold section, we see that a magic-user is 9-12th level, attended by 1d6 monsters, 1d6 low-level apprentices, and 3d6x10 men-at-arms led by Fighting-man lutients. And importantly is neutral or chaotic but not lawful.

In the Rules Cyclopedia, it is noted a level 9 magic-user with a stronghold will attract 1d6 MU level 1-3 and 2d6 normal people of above-average intelligence who want to become MUs but will quit after 1d6 months- discouraged.

While in the AD&D DMG, a DM is instructed to inform a magic-user player that they have just completed a course of apprenticeship with a master who was of unthinkably high level (at least 6th) and was presented with a spell book containing read magic and 3 other spells chosen by the DM or rolled randomly. And noted later that a MU will gain 1 spell, and only one, upon advancement, and will have gathered others from found scrolls, captured spellbooks, and or learned from other party MUs.

Most of the understanding about this relationship is really a collection of practices and assumptions perpetuated through play culture (and shared media) rather than deeply proscribed in the rulebook. In general, the MU mentor is the source of the starting spellbook, often the source of the MU's new spells, and, occasionally, might be called upon to provide a plot hook or identify a magic item. Or serve some other function under the general heading of "mouthpiece for the DM".

At my own table, I'd like to better clarify the costs and benefits of a mentor because it's an important relationship that the player should be able to understand in a more choice-oriented manner: Should I play apprentice or strike out on my own? If the PC chooses to undergo mentorship, we should contextualize the mentor and the relationship in the game world and beyond someone who just automatically provides spells. For the DM, this is a great opportunity for a connection to the game world and setting, providing another digetic avenue to convey information about the world without a lore dump.

Boons

Known spells: The apprentice MU can choose the spell they want to know from the master's book
Item identification: The vast knowledge of the master will easily identify most magic items
Fully stocked arcane distillery: At level 2, the apprentice MU will be able to make the 7 basic potions: diminution, ESP, growth, gaseous form, healing, invisibility, & levitation
Minor wand manufacture: At level 4, the MU will be able to use the facilities to make a wand containing 1d2 levels of spells; can cast in melee; recharge uses a component found in spells
Got yourself in a bit of trouble: The mentor will help undo a curse, the effects of poison, or other malady (but not simply heal HP- just sleep it off), however, it comes at a cost below or some other task.

Banes

The mentors are going to want something from each apprentice. They aren't training people in dangerous arcane arts for a hobby. Each week, roll a 1d12 and consult the following table:

1-9 | Your service is not required and you may do as you wish.
10 | Esoteric needs: Mentor desires the gathering of something seemingly innocuous or inconcequential- Touch this amulet to these 3 spots, make rubbings of this relief, or gather dungeon mushrooms from three corpses.
11 | Demands a body: Mentor desires a body for...reasons. It can't be a skeleton, zombie, or rotted corpse. Humanoid is negotiable or might be the specific goal. If the mentor is "chaotic", it might be important that the unfortunate victim is still alive.
12 | Summoned to the tower: You will be required to take a week off from adventuring to help the master with something. On the upside, you get a free roll on the magical carousing table without the expenditure of coin, but you must make a save to avoid a negative outcome.

As the PC gains levels, the mentor might require further activities that take them wider into the wilderness. They might be envoys to fay kingdoms or intelligent monsters. Or have to perform some act on the master's behalf. And if the mentor is chaotic, that act might be an attempt to bump off the apprentice (shrug). Or something as mundane as tax collection.

It could also be that the mentor wants magic items that a high-level PC is now capable of bringing back.

Insta-Wizard

Let's synthesize the above D&D sources into a unified table to create an interesting NPC mentor that is both a sort of regional lord and an institution.

And again, ktrey's d100- Mercurial Mentors & Weird Wizards will help kick things off with who or what exactly this mentor is.

To establish a Mentor roll:

1d2 for Cosmic alignment:to determine MU Master alignment: odd- Chaotic even- Neutral
1d4+8 for Sorcerer, Necromancer, or Wizard: equals the level of the Mentor
1d6 for Those who serve: to establish the number of open apprenticeships, the remainder is the number of current apprentices (i.e. a roll of 2 indicates two open spots and 4 other apprentices)
1d8 for Monstrous patronage: to establish the rumored, but never seen, monsters that serve the mentor 1. Chimeras 2. Spirits 3. Dragons 4. Elementals 5. Gorgons 6. Minotaurs 7. Demons 8. Gargoyles; all at # encountered in the wilderness
1d10 for (Mostly) Trusted Right-hands: to establish the number of levels of fighting men serving the mentor; none higher than level 4 (i.e. a roll of 6 indicated six levels of Fighting-men, so one level 4 and one level 2 Fighter)
1d12+2 x10 for Foul Foot-soldiers:to establish the number of men-at-arms (if neutral) or beast-men (if chaotic) that serve the mentor

Reason the Mentor is Left Alone by the Crown & Church

It is foolish of me to list all the ways a mentor might be connected to your setting. However, one question we might want to answer immediately is why the Crown or Church not taken action against someone so dangerous? The results here can simply be a reason OR a seed for a subplot involving attempts by NPC to make the apprentice turn double agent.

Maybe because the wizard:

Defeated the Great Beast of the Fell Swamps
Made a 99-year pact with the Church
Has ensorcelled the Crown- a few advisors suspect something
Killed the last two commanders that tried and keeps a third as a songbird
Threatened the Crown with blight and the Church with plague
Pledged to revive the sleeping prince
Threatened to revive the sleeping princess
Knows the Crown is their bastard child
They keep a secret about an atrocity committed by the Church
Romantic entanglement with the Crown- so spicy!
Keeps the true child of the Royal Family
Helped get the new head of the Church the seat of power
The Fay only observe the Truce if they are alive
The Church requires yearly renewal of a particular set of arcane wards
Is the only one who can read the terms of the demonic licence
Has been building a great War Machine, wanted equally by the Crown & Church
Maintains the undead Council- former rulers & adversaries who give advice to the Crown
Enscorcelled all the animals in the kingdom to go mad upon their death
Is a child of the Pit and their death will bring forth a legion from the Fortress of Rust
Sends nightly dreams that depict terrible outcomes if they are removed

Mentor Example

Elizabeth the Lucky decides to seek a new mentor in the lands of the Rose Swamp. During downtime, the DM rolls: even, 4, 6, 7, 4, 3 + 78 on ktrey's table. And informs Liz the Lucky's player of the following:

Vertel the Absent has achieved mastery in the 12 dynamic orders (magic-user level 12) and concerned with cosmic balance. Which is why the magus is said to have stopped a great dragon from raveging the land not by killing it but by challenging it to a game of dreamland chess- a game which continues to this very day. Folks in the immediate area claim that luck has been upended and all for miles everyone's fate is connected to this game. Being wholy occupied by this contest, and in accordance with the wizard's great power, no less than 8 spirits who travel to and from the tower on moonless nights doing the great mage's bidding. In addition, a hero (fighter level 4) of renown leads the wizard's personal guard. This captain and guard (50 strong) are said to be the knight and company sent to slay the dragon, but pledged fieldy to the wizard once Vertel's deft solution brought a sudden end to the creature's rampage.

Vertel is willing to accept any who desire apprenticeship along as they first pass through a wall of flame that guards the front door.* And why had the Crown not knocked down the tower? Vertel has threatened the Crown with blight and Church with plague.

If you want more on magic, just check out some other posts about running Magic-Users in D&D

BERSERK by Kentaro Miura

Prismatic Wasteland posted a bunch of potential blog topics, which I collected into a list of 34 possible posts to keep in my back pocket when I feel uninspired or bored or want to exercise my creative thinking. Here is the previous one: EYE OF NEWT AND A DASH OF STARDUST: Ingredients for Fairy Tale Adventures

In general, limb replacement can be performed with regeneration or with some interpretations of restoration or in extreme cases, by getting the PC killed and going with reincarnation. For the options below, I tried to come up with rituals that would require folk lore, magic of Old Gods, obscure rituals, bargains, and commitments to those giving this “gift”. In a game, they would be an option the PCs could research, require a new contact with an NPC, and have a twist that makes it cheaper than paying the 2000-5000 gp cost of orthodox routes.

It might be fun to roll below 3 times and have those be the only option for arm (or limb) restoration as a method of world-building or reinforcing the occult nature of magic. Meaning magic is not tailor-made like modern medicine but was established through routes that work, not routes that are efficient/”clean” aka magic as fantasy science- bleh.

Also, don’t forget that each of the below can be riffed on depending the situation, so maybe you want to replace a leg but get the arm-replaced-by-goosehead & neck, well that could be changed to the leg of a mule/goat but it will try to always kick nobility.

1d20 replacements for the arm that bugbear just ripped off your torso & may work for other limbs too…

A hook forged by the famed cannibal Malic the Toothsome, noted amputator, gourmand, and prosthetics fashioner; payment is eating your own limb at a dinner for two with a paired wine chosen by you
The stone arm from a statue of Ishtar after you have prayed incessantly for 7 days and to permanently gain function PC must prosthetize as a cleric of Ishtar
A trained stygian python from the cult of Yg, but you have to let it loose in downtime to hunt giant rats make a 2d6 reaction check to see if it comes back and in what disposition
The amputated arm of your shadow, severed & stitched back on with spider silk by a witch; children, goblins, and clerics will notice your one-armed shadow easily
Domesticate slime, pudding, or ooze beaten within an inch of its “life” and cast charm monster on it; lose dexterity and might dissolve whatever it touches as per the monster of the same type
The arm of a scarecrow that has seen at least 1 season from planting to harvest; graft functions using living pumpkin roots smeared with 3 crushed lizard tails jammed into the wound and the scarecrow limb
Any piece of a troll or hydra grown and shaped, like an ornamental plant, into an arm, but every level up, make a save vs spells, two successive failures means monsterification, otherwise works quickly
Sew a jacket, with one arm taken from a different jacket and terminating in a glove taken from somewhere else, using the seinew from an animated corpse, flesh construct, or undead; when wearing the jacket, the “empty” arm is highly flexible, looks real, but can’t hold more than a purse of coins
A beam of light passing through a stained glass window after continual light & phantasmal force have been cast; arm glows as candle light, can pass through objects, but only allows the faintest of touch and hold barely a feather
A charmed giant centipede, after charmed monster has been cast, will always appear at inappropriate moments in an unsettling way (negative to negotiate, positive to intimidate)
The severed neck & head of a goose or swan after giving an offering to the petty god of serpentine things of 500 gp in value; vicious and surprisingly able to manipulate a dagger expertly when used for dark purpose.
Intact arm of a zombie, ghoul, or wight; save vs paralysis to not strangle any priest, cleric, or good-aligned religious official you meet and might awkwardly salute evil religious figures, icons, and/or gods
A planted seed of either an oak or a rose bush, which will rapidly grow into are arm in 4 weeks; oak arm adds +1 AC if non-sword arm, while a rose arm gives +1 to reaction rolls
Clockwork prosthetic make from the dwarven artisan Able Ticker Tink after payment with 5 gems of 5 different colors, each worth 250 gp each; winding required every 3rd downtime action
Your reflection’s arm severed with a silver dagger from a mirror catching the moonlight after hold portal has been cast; every full moon, said reflection must be given an offering for its “loss” or else…
Make an offering to benthic gods of 500 gp for a giant octopus tentacle or 250 gp for a giant crab claw; both can be eaten with butter in a pinch, but it is a blasphemous act to said god(s)
The arm of a demon/devil you win in a game of chance, while another better body part (or a friend can bet one for you); the fiend will go double or nothing for a second go if pairs of parts are bet (exclude fingers/toes)
Trained monkey or particularly clever parrot- nothing crazy here, just an expensively trained animal (500gp) that will require a loyalty check to grab anything dangerous and won’t fight.
Arm-y ants who are protecting the queen you buried in your shoulder; resists severing as ants reform but 2x damage to fire after a year, save vs paralysis or you are actually a colony of sentient ants!
An arm gifted by one of the fay courts after a season’s salon will come with a court-specific quirk (always snap when walking or roll a glass orb) and a court-mandated purpose (may only hold weapons of beauty or used in the pursuit of lost objects)

TORCHES (6): A RPG Microblog Collection 6

Reaper Miniatures
sculpt: B. Jackson

1. Moldvay's Labyrinth: Someone has made a dungeon crawler based on Moldvay Basic D&D. Apple phone and Android!

2. When in doubt, fuck up the moon! Save Vs. Worm does just that in this fantastic post about moon men that crawl from their lunar haunts to raid the earth! Also has a cool calendar.

3. Combat in Abstract: Over at Press the Beast, there is a lengthy discussion on old-school combat shortcuts.

4. Barrowmaze Retrospective: Having run both Barrowmaze and Archaia this is a fair evaluation of my own experience and why Nightwick continues to enchant after 100+ sessions.

5. Ah, Delicious in Dungeon!: Skerples has the Monster Menu-All of the classic AD&D Monster which "takes all the creatures in [the AD&D Monster Manual], divides them by flavour and effect, and gives random tables and neat little rules for some of them".

6. Known Spells of Wizards Past: At Half Again As Much, the good Dr. Curious looks at their father's D&D known spell list, which contains 400+ different spells across 14 levels. While they contain the old standards, they also span the mundane (Summon Frog) to the wicked sounding (Wailing Wheel of Fire). Its a fantastic resource that reminds up how free-wheeling Dungeons & Dragons once was before being standardized (perhaps too much) by convention.

* Bonus because I am thinking about NPCs as of late. Here is an interesting perspective on creating NPCs using: Name, rough age, notable physical detail. Skill, Skill, Skill. One Obsession. One Secret. One Burden